Sunday, July 12, 2009

Simplified Decisions

It is funny how a single event or realization can make you go "ohhhhhhhh, I get it now." Well, I get it. Decisions do not have to be as complicated as we make them. I know, I know, I often overanalyze every single detail of a decision, creating a "what if" tree to try to figure out which outcome would be the best. A friend points out that you can't plan around emotions. I can be as mad as I want for feeling a certain way about a feeling that I can not help, but you know what? I'm human, and it is what it is. I can't guarantee that another person in my position would feel the same way and I don't know that anyone knowing this would care. More than likely (9 times out of 10) someone else would just shrug and say oh well.

I am very happy about a decision I recently made. It worked out in my favor. I did exactly what I wanted and when all was said and I done I was perplexed about what my anxieties regarding that decision were. "It's not that deep" is what I will be saying to myself to remind me that no one else really cares about the decisions I make unless they directly affect them, so I need to stop trying to tiptoe around eggshells to protect everyone's ego; especially those of distant "strangers."

I'd write more, but I wouldn't want to overanalyze. Haha.

Have a great Sunday!

Wednesday, July 01, 2009

Drama Free Summer

Seriously. Drama is so played out. I absolutely abhor it. I like honesty and truthfulness, but not blunty rude. I hate back-stabbing and being spiteful. I hate mind games and tricks being played. I like walks along a cool summer night with great conversation. I hate cursing and swearing. I hate when people compare individuals. I hate being compared. I hate being ostracized or left out on purpose. I like inclusion and making everyone feel welcome. I love hugs and kisses on the cheek. I hate obligated hugs. I hate air conditioning. I love having the car windows down singing along with music. I hate when people don't say excuse me or hold the door or even slightly push it back for you. I hate seeing kids talk back to their parents. I hate reality shows that just reinforce stereotypes others have tried so hard to fight. I hate when people think they know everything. I hate not being able to ask a question because I just know that person is judging my intelligence. I hate when people smoke. I especially hate it when smokers feel the need to stand right by the non-smoking doorway. I love dancing. I love when someone grabs your hand and leads you somewhere. I love chapstick. I hate being the only one in a room with a certain opinion, yet I love that I can hold my ground and stand for what I believe. I hate that I keep falling for the wrong guys. Over and over again. I hate when people cheat. I hate when people try to involve me in a lie. I actually hate keeping secrets; it used to be fun but now they get more serious and held to the grave. I hate not being able to talk to friends because of time zones. I hate money. I love the wind and the sky and rainbows. I love the sound of water hitting the shore. I hate the thought of drowning. I would hate if I was that tree falling in the forrest that "doesn't make a sound." I love to listen to people's stories. I love to talk. I hate when people talk over other people. I hate being rushed while I'm eating. I hate fakeness. I hate the "politics" of life. I love that I don't know what's going to happen next, but I hate being anxious. I love people that are just simply good people. I love looking into someone's eyes and seeing that pure love for life. I love God and all the things He has done. I'd hate if I didn't know Him. I hate when people don't answer hypothetical questions. I love to discuss books and ideas. I hate it when people are mean to others. I hate seeing people spit. I hate brussel sprouts. I love corn. I love how some people are not bothered by things. I love it when someone knows a lot about something and shares. I love running into people I know in the city. I hate having to make the effort all the time. I'd hate to be on call 24/7. I hate when babies cry. I hate it when something is bothering someone and you ask them over and over and they tell you know, yet a friend of yours tells you the truth. I hate the stupid choices that people make. I hate when people don't know how you feel. I hate drama.

Ok, so there's probably a lot more 'I hate's' then 'I love' and I guess that was me venting all of 2009 out (ahhhhhhhhh), so let's end on a good note. The weather has been absolutely gorgeous lately, and I can not wait to spend more time outside this holiday weekend. I have several married friends who are preparing to have kids and it's a wonderful thing. I am really happy for them. Life is good.