Thursday, September 16, 2010

Uber Excitement

Thanks for all the comments on my previous post!! I love your feedback.

Ok, so I feel a little like I just joined a 12 step program:

First there's denial - " I'm ok, I'm really ok "

Then there's anger - "People suck!! "

Then there's acceptance - "Everything will be ok."

So maybe my last post was an angry jab at the sucky people in the world (step 2), but now I've accepted it and I'm moving on. (Ok, maybe it's more like a 3 step program). I AM the new girl in town - on my own little island. 

I can do just about anything I want - I can visit various organizations and stay if I like it and not go back if I don't. I was VP of an organization before - here I have no responsibilities just yet, so its all about finding what's right for me. 

Now to the fun part. I am so excited to try all the new things that I've just realized I could do. I am a big supporter of - if you've never checked it out it is a Great (and Safe) way to meet people when you are the new person in town. (Summary of meetup - it is not a match making site. It is for people to meet with others who like doing the same thing; i.e. if you like baseball but have no one to go to the game with you find a baseball meetup, and suddenly you have people to sit with; or if you want a gym partner, someone to try new restaurants with, someone to go to the movies with, etc, you just find a group on the website that fits your need and you meet those people in a public setting).  So, through meetup, I am finding tons of things that are going on within a 30 minute radius of where I live. And this is an improvement than the 60-90 minute radius I had before.

So I'm excited to go to Zumba, and try a pottery class, learn what permaculture is (something to do with plants I think), learn Japanese, watch foreign films, try tap dancing again, kick someone's butt in kickboxing, write a novel, become a mentor to a child, build a house;  the possibilities are endless. And of course there's the good ole wide world web and Google. So there's so much to do that getting out there and trying it is the only logical option.

I believe that everything happens for a reason. So I choose to think that this whole weeding out process and going through these hard lessons over the past 5 years, has only taught me the skills that I will need in this new process. Of learning who you can and can not trust, about the people that will say one thing and do another, or of the people that will use and abuse just to refuse. So everything is an incredible lesson, and that is what I choose to take from it.

I am woman world, hear me ROARRRRRR!!!

Photo: Paradise Island in the Dominican Republic
(All photos are mine, unless cited in credits)

Wednesday, September 08, 2010

Too much Effort

I'm basically done . . . with making all the effort. I've used this year to reflect on things and the ultimate conclusion is that people are basically selfish. They take and take and take until you have nothing left to give. And I love to give, but I'm not a rag that you can squeeze. So I'm done. I'm done making all the effort, initating all the conversations, done caring about your problems, when the minute everything is going right for you forget about me; can't even ask me how my day is going. And I thought it was my imagination and that maybe I was being harsh, but nope, after waiting months it's as clear as day. Everyone is concerned with their own little self-bubble. And when they need help or want a favor they are as nice as can be. Once they get what they want good luck even borrowing a bead of sweat.

This social network age doesn't help - being bombarded with facebook updates that I could care less about (like 'I broke a nail') almost makes you immune to news; that even when you hear of good things going on in the world you are just on information overload. So I've learned to delete people, because I don't need to be facebook friends with everyone, not the acquaintances who hardly talk to me, or the people you meet once at a party. We've just gotten so used to being in the know. Well maybe I don't want to know what you are doing if you don't care enough to ask me what I'm doing.

Life is too short to waste effort on people or things that are counterproductive.
'Never make someone your priority when you are their option' (someone).

I'm done making YOU my priority. I love doing it, but all I am is an occassional optional if you are bored, so yeah, no more miss nice girl!